Some of my favorite George W. Bush Quotes...

"I want you to know. Karyn is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me." -Nashville, Tenn., May 27, 2004

"Then you wake up at the high school level and find out that the illiteracy level of our children are appalling." -Washington, D.C., Jan. 23, 2004

"Free societies are hopeful societies. And free societies will be allies against these hateful few who have no con-science, who kill at the whim of a hat." -Washington, D.C., Sept. 17, 2004

"I want to thank the astronauts who are with us, the courageous spacial entrepreneurs who set such a wonderful example for the young of our country." -Washington, D.C. Jan. 14, 2004

"We will make sure our troops have all that is necessary to complete their missions. That's why I went to the Congress last September and proposed fundamental - supplemental funding, which is money for armor and body parts and am-munition and fuel." -Erie, Pa., Sept. 4, 2004

"I hear there's rumors on the Internets that we're going to have a draft." -Second presidential debate, St. Louis, Mo., Oct. 8, 2004

"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." -Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." -Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004

Sarah Palin may be...

Mother of poorly raised daughter who believed that pregnancy out of wedlock only happened to poor minorities.

Gun-toting redneck of the frozen white north.

Murderer and eater of caribou, wolves and polar bears.

A believer in a fictitious deity who may have been the absentee father of some Hispanic guy named Jesus (who may or may not have been born to a woman who "said" she was a virgin so that her boyfriend wouldn't leave her).

One of the millions of poor deluded fools who believe that global warming is a left-wing conspiracy.

Anti-choice, anti-condom, and anti-education.

Uneducated about most of the very important things a leader should know.

.... But she does look a hell of a lot like Tina Fey. I wish I could vote just so I could make her the VP so that Tina Fey could play her on an SNL skit about the government. It'd be worth a hundred years of war, countless casualties, and the largest debt in the history of mankind with a crypt-keeper President just so we could see more of Tina Fey. Tina Fey is funny.